Eenie Meanie (2025) – Film Evaluation

Eenie Meanie, 2025.

Written and Directed by Shawn Simmons.
Starring Samara Weaving, Karl Glusman, Kyanna Simone Simpson, Randall Park, Steve Zahn, Andy García, Chris Bauer, Chelsey Crisp, Mike O’Malley, Marshawn Lynch, Elle Graham, Jermaine Fowler, Edy Modica, Phuong Kubacki, Tim Neff, Michael C. Pizzuto, Penelope Lou, Nicolas Bosc, and Jon Elliott.

SYNOPSIS:

A reformed teenage getaway driver is dragged again into her unsavory previous when a former employer presents her an opportunity to avoid wasting the lifetime of her chronically unreliable ex-boyfriend.

A movie a few reformed getaway driver nicknamed Eenie Meanie (Samara Weaving) must be infinitely extra enjoyable than regardless of the hell tone deaf nonsense director Shawn Simmons has whipped up right here.

Filled with F-bombs, one minute, it’s a violent romp that errors a disregard for human life as comedy (it’s alarming how usually characters, a few of them with no motive for us to want ailing on them, are both shot or run over useless in what’s performed for laughs). The following minute it’s making an attempt to unpack Edith Meaney’s (you may see the place the corny nickname comes from) trauma involving the drug addicted dad and mom that received her positioned into foster properties and on the highway to a lifetime of crime to start with, to her psychotic ex-boyfriend John (Karl Glusman) hilariously bursting into lovey dovey speeches (sometimes when surrounded by useless our bodies) which can be performed straight as if they’re meant to be taken critically, to an precise on line casino heist of a luxurious automobile stuffed with tens of millions of {dollars} that isn’t solely considerably enjoyable, however most likely ought to have been a bigger focus of the narrative.

On the story’s starting, Edith has lower ties together with her longtime boyfriend (since they have been youngsters, when he saved her from abuse), John, occurring eight months now. Properly, it’s not lengthy earlier than it’s revealed that she broke this streak as soon as, three months in the past to be precise, and is now pregnant along with his youngster. Working a number of dead-end jobs and making an attempt to stay an sincere life, she does, in opposition to her higher judgment, determine to move over to John’s condo and with intentions of breaking the information. Nevertheless, when she arrives, she already finds herself bailing him out of life-threatening hazard as he has as soon as once more gotten himself right into a dicey state of affairs.

As soon as they escape that peril, John reveals that he has a card counter, Leo (Randall Park), stashed away in a crate (with holes poked into it for respiration) someplace off the crushed path. For causes which can be contrived and would take too lengthy to correctly get into (a minimum of half this film is organising that Edith and John should pull off one final getaway driving gig), it seems a large number must be cleaned up, connecting again to Andy Garcia’s Nick, a career-criminal who desires the job completed. Naturally, they’re given a crew to work alongside. There’s additionally an opportunity that NFL All-Star turned hilarious actor Marshawn Lynch, as a facially scarred rival who turns into the butt of a number of lazy Freddy Krueger jokes, is aware of concerning the job and might be planning to intervene for private acquire.

Other than aimlessly and boringly drifting via extreme exposition and setup, it’s simply unclear what Shawn Simmons desires to do right here. There’s a somber reconnection with Edith’s father (Steve Zahn), now in a wheelchair, that’s welcome however in the end doesn’t imply a lot, since, even when Eenie Meanie is, at its core, a movie about slicing ties with the individuals liable for ruining the eponymous character’s life (within the case of John, he repeatedly throws it into disarray regardless of his real love for her), the characterization is hole.

Worse, there isn’t a deal with on the punkish tone, which then jumps into the heist itself whereas making an attempt (and failing) to generate an emotional funding into each the survival of Edith and John and the destiny of their relationship. The automobile chase itself is mildly entertaining and seemingly completed considerably virtually, however results in a comical, shoulder-shrug of a decision to the remainder of the story.

If that is meant to be a human story, Shawn Simmons has failed; it’s all too ridiculous, cartoonish, and slapped along with components of the story that by no means coalesce into an entire, meaningfully informing each other. It’s additionally taking itself far too critically to operate as a goofy retro motion flick. That leaves the heist as the one worthwhile side right here, which is possibly quarter-hour of the working time. Eenie Meanie Miney No.

Flickering Fantasy Ranking – Movie: ★ ★ / Film: ★ ★

Robert Kojder

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